Welcome quiet seekers

Well I first off want to start by apologizing for any and all offense I may cause anyone reading this blog. I just speak my own truth and I recognize we all have our own experiences and truths of what is best for each of us individually. I have decided to share some of my "stuff" in hopes someone somewhere will take something positive away from it. Take what works for you and leave the rest. Much of what I post may just be my own trial and error,  my own theories and research, along with some definite concrete evidence or one side of a multiple sided medical finding. I again am just telling my own personal truth.

Next I will apologize for my writing and grammar and darting sometimes ADD way of communicating in text. I am  but a humble housewife with much life experience and minimal classroom education. If you feel the need to correct me go ahead knowing I am happy to learn and appreciate anyone taking the time to help me.

This first post is just a simple outline of me, my family and where we are in life.

I am Brooke. Brooke Williams once when life was simple and care-free and filled with time....and quiet.
I was Brooke Gunn from 20 yrs old until 21 yrs old. In this time I had a beautiful baby girl named Candice Mae Gunn. This was a pivotal time for me as I learned at a very young age what true heartache and loneliness were. I also learned the power I had to make hard decisions and how to take an active role in my happiness and how to find quiet again.

I'll explain what quiet means to me. It goes along the lines, " Let the storm rage and Quiet the child." I have been through a few storms in which I have found some definite personal peace, learning, and god willing "quiet".

Now, I am Brooke Blake, married to the most wonderful man Nick Blake. We have 3 daughters, Candice 10 years old (previous marriage) and two of our own Patsey 5 years and Vivian 3 years as of 2013. These girls are the light and love of my life, the tenderness and mercy and sometimes god willing they are the quiet in my storm...sometimes they're the storm.

For many years growing up my mom owned a home daycare. From 2nd grade until I graduated and left the nest, we had taken care of others children and loved them as they were our own. I was Certified in child development by 15 yrs of age and had already dealt with choking, fainting, seizures, disabilities, and a number of other things associated with children and childcare.

I worked at a number of other daycares in the southern Utah area, I was a nanny In Las Vegas NV at 18yrs old and at 24yrs I opened my own in-home daycare and ran it for 3 awesome years. So I feel confident in saying I know a bit about kids.

My own children are proving to elude much of my seemingly vast hands on 20+ years experience with children.

I have realized that the babies (apart from Vivian) were the easiest part of this raising little humans journey. I know many of you already understand this, with children raised and gone, so any comments of advise are welcome. It takes a village, right?

It is challenging to co-parent a child within the reality of divorce. When Nick and I got married we did our best to understand Candice's needs as she went back and forth and struggled even at age 3-5 with her reality. We are still working with her and learning how to be good loving and stable for her to thrive. She is such an amazing kid, who receives award after award in school, gets awesome grades and is the best big sister and daughter anyone could ask for.

At this point Nick wanted 9 kids.......yes NINE! All boys, a whole football team. I told him reality would bite him for that. We had Patsey and she was the tiniest little pixie of a babe. She would sing as she slept and was a wonderful baby. She was developmentally normal, and hit every milestone dead center. She is curious and sweet and funny and all the other things that any loving parent had thought of their "easiest" child. I am sure that me deeming her the "easiest" will also bite me one day but for now I am thankful for her nature and willingness to listen and learn and stay happy even when shes cleaning.

Right know in this post its all rainbows and sunshine. I get tired of this type of reading. I am a positive person, and I have developed a pretty thick skin in 30yrs, so I feel as though I get more out of reading about peoples nitty gritty. We all have wonderful things in our lives, but we cannot recognize these wonders without also experiencing the hard things in our lives. Within the realm of social media its easy to pick and choose what is "seen" (read) by others. It is within the hard that I believe you are in perfect placement to help and serve others. It is within the darkness you are also willing to accept a light from someone else extending their lantern of hope and help and love.

This brings me to Vivian. She is our little ginger girl who, starting at 2 weeks old, became a force of trial and error, love and compassion, frustration and delight that I had never experienced with a child. She is undiagnosed Autistic. The next post will be Vivians story up to the undiagnosis (I will explain this term as well) and how we coped (poorly) up until we realized it was imperative for her sake we change everything.

Her story will also answer why Nicks number of  9 kids went down to 5 and as Vivian grew we both decided  3 was enough.

We love our 3 girls.