I am ready to talk about a very tough situation we've been going through for 3 1/2 months.A few already know about this, and I try to not cry for pity on social media, but we have been really struggling and a few weeks ago I asked for prayers without explanation, so I want to explain.
This may be a bit graphic, and could be a trigger for someone dealing with sexual assault. Writing is therapeutic for me, so I write in reality.
May 20th Vivian started bleeding from her vaginal area. We took her immediately to the ER where they tested for blood in her urine, bacterial infections and kidney problems, all were negative. She bled in her night pull-up, and bled through 2 pairs of underwear that day, and was actively bleeding at the ER.
Once infections were ruled out while at the hospital, and no visible reason was seen for the vaginal bleeding, the forensic nurse determined our next step was to open a possible sexual assault investigation. They did a rape kit on Vivian for DNA and interviewed Nick and I together and separately and tried to interview Vivian, which although she has come leaps and bounds in 9 months, her cognitive understanding and reasoning is still around 20-24 months so she gave no clear answers to the forensic nurse. We were in the ER for over 5 hours. They were ready to take Vivian from us and put her in protective custody until they had concluded our interviews and proved to them we were not the reason for the bleeding, we also had to comply that we would not be sending her on the bus or to school again, until the investigation was concluded.
We have been let down by every single agency involved in this terrifying trial.
First off, The investigation for assault is finally closed with no conclusive evidence found for assault. Thank goodness.
The hospital never contacted police or CPS the way they told us they would as per their policy. They took the rape kit and 3 undergarments in for evidence, secured it in a sealed paper bag and put it on a shelf to await a police officer to pick it up and deliver to a DNA testing facility to determine if there was any foreign DNA.
Had Nick or I not followed up every 3-4 days and demanded answers and progress I believe nothing would have ever happened and the rape kit taken on our 3 year old and her bloody underwear would still be setting on that shelf.
Detectives were not notified by the ER ( we called local law enforcement a week after, once we realized the ER never called) and the detectives were not actively investigating until more than 2 months after our visit to the ER. Nick and I had been being told by police, " We are on it, just be patient." for weeks.When we realized nothing was actually being done, we drove unannounced and stormed into the detectives office in Aug, the DNA evidence had not been picked up and no other interviews done with the people who were within the 72 hour window of contact with Vivian before the bleeding started
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The school district was not aware of the allegations until I called them to request that Vivian have deferred services once school started due to the open investigation. I was told by the hospital not to let her interact with the school and so obviously I was not going to allowing Vivi to be there until the investigation concluded and everyone involved was cleared, or anything founded was taken care of.
We were informed by the detective that the hospitals report made no mention of blood. It stated we brought Vivian in, a rape kit was taken, 3 undergarments along with the rape kit were taken and sealed for evidence, we were interviewed, she was interviewed.... but no where did they mention they visualized blood in Vivian's underwear, or even possible blood, or alleged blood. Nick and I were the only ones stating there was blood.
No prime suspects were named, only telephone interviews were conducted with the school district staff, which is the only other place Vivian was within 72 hrs of her bleeding, while detectives came to our home, and conducted video taped interviews of Nick and I separately even after we were interviewed by the forensic nurse at the hospital. Nick and I would have done 200 interviews and any other thing they asked to find out why our daughter was bleeding. We not only cooperated, we were lighting fires under everyone to get results.
Vivian was interviewed 3 times by 3 different people because we had no valid diagnosis of developmental disability. We were treated as if we were "dumbing down" our daughter. After no intelligible answers to questions were given and it was clear she had no cognitive understanding of the situation, it was suggested that we may need to get her diagnosed. As upset as I am at this, had she been diagnosed, they may have treated the whole situation differently.... Maybe.
I took her to 2 different Doctors to see if there were any other medical explanation to the bleeding. Doctors would not even evaluate her during an active investigation. Which I understand because they do not want to mess any possible evidence up or cause other situations to permeate the child's mind.
The school district receives federal $ for the preschool they run for developmentally delayed or disabled children. They are under legal contract to provide services to Vivian as they determined necessary in their assessment of her. She is not like other neurologically normal children who can take a few months or year even off of preschool and enter Kindergarten at the level other children are. Deferred services are given for many reasons, from home therapy due to allergies, to going to another school district because of misconduct or family reasons.
After phone interviews were conducted with each staff member, the director for the preschool came back and said although the sexual assault investigation was open and active, and we where waiting for DNA evidence (which hadn't even been picked up from the hospital) they would not do anything for Vivian and she would need to attend preschool as per normal, or after a period of time, she would be un- enrolled.
And finally, 3 months after the bleeding and ER visit, we let detectives know lawyers were being called, the Governors ombudsman was already investigating and we were ready to call the media. Suddenly the DNA evidence was at the DNA testing facility, expedited (we had been told the testing process could take 30-60 days) and within 2 weeks the results came back positive for Vivian's blood only and all other types of foreign DNA, saliva, semen, and dermis was negative.
Massive malfeasance and negligence has eroded almost all faith that these agencies would help us and work for the best interest of our innocent child.
All involved dropped and passed the ball.
Our prayers have been answered though, and DNA evidence shows that no assault took place on our little girl. Thank you to all who have been supporting and praying for us. We are still trying to move forward a little at a time. Our older children do not know what has been happening, and Vivian seems to have no understanding as well as no mental or emotional set backs or trauma.
We still do not know why she was bleeding. We are going the medical route next, and hoping this will be an easier and faster avenue. If nothing can be found medically ( researching has shown medical possibilities such as hormone imbalance, blood clots, tumors, vein clusters etc...) then we will rest easy and pray it never happens again.
Parents, No One cares about your kids as much as you do. Be headstrong and be unstoppable in your love and fight as long and as steadfast as you can for your children.
